What to do with your hands at a Networking Event.

This morning I got a question from one of the Chapman grads I work with frequently and it’s a good one that I should share.

Chapman grad – “I realized last week in a networking setting that I have NO idea what to do with my hands when I'm standing in a group of people. I never land on anything that works, and then overthink it and feel awkward about it. Any advice?”

I loved his questions because I struggle with what to do with my hands at times when all I want to do is flip my pen around. A few things that work for me:

Things to do - You can keep both hands behind your back with your fingers clasped. Clasped in front works too but some men make it look awkward. You can put your thumb in one pant or suit pocket hang the rest of your hand out while keeping the other hand at your side. If you put both thumbs in your pockets it looks like a “John Wayne” stance (howdy cowboy) although, I do that all the time and it works fine for me. I fidget all the time so I like to lock down my hands. I like to keep my business cards in my left pocket so I can shake with my right while handing my business card with your left. Sometimes I totally mess this up and hand the card to the person upside down but heck I’m human and I make mistakes too. Not often, mind you. 

Things not to do – Don’t cross your arms in front of you - it makes you unapproachable. If someone is annoying you with a rambling conversation, though, it’s a good thing to do because it verbally signals – I’m done. Also don’t hold on to one arm with the other arm – it looks awkward. I see people doing this all the time because they are nervous, every time I see people do this I think they are nervous and/or shy.